Castle Shima

Tell you what, Lor. We'll get a redneck keyboard just for you. Your can type in your password as "Chicken, rooster, cow, pig.."
-- Robbie, from a conversation at the office.

::: Tower View :::
Diet Rite
I was buying a large bag of Purina dog food at the local grocery store and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked "Oh, do you have a dog?"

On impulse, I said "No, I don't have a dog, but I am starting 'The Purina Diet' again. I probably shouldn't because the last time I did it, I ended up in the hospital. But I did lose 50 pounds before I had to go to intensive care with IVs in both arms."

She continued to look amazed as I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with the Purina nuggets. Anytime you feel hungry, you simply eat one or two. The food is nutritionally complete so it was perfect. I simply had to try it again.

Horrified, she asked "Did you end up in intensive care because of an allergic reaction to the the dog food? Or did it poison you?"

I replied "Oh no. I was sitting in the street licking my balls when a car hit me."

-- And if you believe that, I've got some beach front property in Nevada to sell you. Hat tip: Fury
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* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
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