Castle Shima

Music is the harmonious voice of creation; an echo of the invisible world.
-- Giuseppe Mazzini

::: Tower View :::
Nothing Is Real
Living Colour has always been a favourite band of mine. When I heard that their song Cult of Personality is going to be on Guitar Hero 3, I went into overdrive and started looking up their videos.

Here is another great song from them called Type
.
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When did I lose my sense of purpose?
Can I regain what's lost inside?
Why do I feel like I deserve this?
Why does my pain look like my pride?
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Duty is the great business of a sea officer; all private considerations must give way to it, however painful it may be.
-- Lord Horatio Nelson

::: Tower View :::
Surviving The Day
During the war against Napoleon, when Admiral Nelson wanted to know how many people were dead, he would ask, "What's the butcher's bill for today?"

I felt the same way recently.

Recently, my company has gone through some layoffs. Out of the 80 people released from the Information Technology (IT) division, my dept contained 30 of those people. There were 3 out of my own area; one whom reported to me.

It felt strange because I had forgotten that it was going to happen. We had be warned that it was coming, but it been nearly a decade since something like this even occurred.

One by one, people were getting phone calls to walk over to a conference room in the main building so that they would be given the news that they had just lost their job.

A few of us even had the idea of walking over to the building, go to a conference room on a different floor, then call someone we knew. If they were brave enough to answer, we would just ask them to look up our calendar.

Funny? Yes. Mean? Absolutely. Cruel? Perhaps.

What would have been really cruel would be to lose your job, then realize, you cant afford to lose it. That you live from check to check and barely surviving.

I would hate for anyone to lose their job, but would hate even more for them to be put in that situation.

Lord knows that I am already in that predicament.
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Shadow of the Day

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When did I lose my sense of purpose?
Can I regain what's lost inside?
Why do I feel like I deserve this?
Why does my pain look like my pride?
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Some motherfuckers are always trying to ice skate uphill.
-- Blade

::: Tower View :::
I'm No Hero

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When did I lose my sense of purpose?
Can I regain whats lost inside?
Why do I feel like I deserve this?
Why does my pain look like my pride?
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Hazel: Lord Frith, I know you've looked after us well, and its wrong to ask even more of you. But my people are in terrible danger, and so I would like to make a bargain with you. My life in return for theirs.
Frith: There is not a day or night that a doe offers her life for her kittens. Or some honest captain of Owsla, his life for his chief. But there is no bargain. What is, is what must be.
-- from Watership Down

::: Tower View :::
For Fuck's Sake
There are just some days that you just need to say "fuck it." That no matter what happens, you can do no right and only damage and hurt follow in your wake.



If you've never seen the movie Snatch, I highly recommend it. Not only is there alot of swearing, which I'm really good at, but the story is funny as hell.
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************************************************
When did I lose my sense of purpose?
Can I regain what's lost inside?
Why do I feel like I deserve this?
Why does my pain look like my pride?
************************************************

Like most things, I am nothing.
-- Li Mu Bai from Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon

::: Tower View :::
This World Is Only Going To Break Your Heart
Wicked Game by H.I.M


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************************************************
When did I lose my sense of purpose?
Can I regain what's lost inside?
Why do I feel like I deserve this?
Why does my pain look like my pride?
************************************************

Once you have accepted your destiny, nothing can alter it unless time flows backwards, snow falls in the spring, and the dead come back to life.
-- Goddess Manshen from The Promise

::: Tower View :::
I'm Waiting For My Real Life To Begin
The song is originally from Colin Hay of Men at Work fame. This version from the tv show Scrubs was really well done.


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************************************************
When did I lose my sense of purpose?
Can I regain what's lost inside?
Why do I feel like I deserve this?
Why does my pain look like my pride?
************************************************

Keep the sand out of your weapons. Keep those actions clear. I'll see you on the beach.
-- Capt. Miller from Saving Private Ryan

::: Tower View :::
Son of a Beach
Every year I participate in the MS150, which is the main fundraiser for the Multiple Sclerosis Society. Bicyclists from around the area will ride either 150 miles or 150 km (120 miles) during the course of two days in order raise money to fight MS.

Since the route goes along the ocean following the beach line, the view is actually quite good. It makes up for the series of bridges that have to be climbed in order to get to the finish line on both days.

The downside is that for our region, its not 150 miles, but rather 164 miles. Bastards.

Granted, this year's MS150 would be exceptional since its the first time that Team Blue (formerly the KBT team) would be corporately sponsored and we would have money to spend on things such as a support vehicle, a corporate recovery tent, and of all things, food.


So with apologies to Peter King...

The Ten Things I Think I Know About The MS150, 2007 edition
1) Whose idea was it to have us ride during a damn monsoon? Day 1 consisted of 20mph winds and that was the easy day. Day 2 had 30mph winds and we had to finish the last 25 miles going straight into it.

2) Ever been to the beach during high winds? Its like being sandblasted; the damn stuff cuts into everything, including you. Paint has actually been taken off my bicycle. On the good side, it works great for removing that extra skin.

3) There was no shortage of fluids this year. It would have been preferred to drink the water as opposed to wearing it as the rain continously poured down on us. Add the wind and the rain actually hurt.

4) Another Team Blue rider decided he wanted a challenge so he wrecked his bike on a wet bridge grate. This was just so he could convert his very expensive bike to a single speed and suffer thru the last 15 miles of Day 1.

5) All season, after putting in almost 1,500 miles and not a single major injury, what happens? My knee begins to ache after the first 40 miles on Day 1. After 50 miles, I had a limp. After 60, every pedal stroke actually hurt. I ended up dropping from an average of 20mph to 15mph and consuming nearly a bottle of Advil. Day 2 was more annoying when my average speed dropped to 10mph because of the damn winds.

6) I wasnt the only victim to injury. In separate incident, a fellow Team Blue rider was injured when his razor jumped up out of his shaving kit bag and bit him on the finger.

7) The biggest battle on day 1: Watching a Team Blue rider attempt to circumvent the fence that blocked his way to lunch. Unfortunately the Fence won the match 2 - 0 and Big G was forced to walk the long way around to get his turkey wrap.

8) At the end of Day 1, we had real burgers for the second lunch. At the end of Day 2, we had more burgers. Guess what I had for lunch yesterday and today?

9) For dinner, a few of us skipped the typical sponsored spaghetti dinner and went to the local Japanese steak house. We had a Spainaird chef cook our Japanese dinner over the teppanyaki grill while salsa music played in the background. All this while another chef, Japanese in heritage, screeched thru a very bad Engrish version of Happy Birthday to another patron. Diversity indeed.

10) Mental note to self: Next year, at the end of the day 2, even after battling high winds, be sure to pick up my finish line medal before flopping down on the ground, grabbing the knee in pain, and whimpering like a little girl. There is nothing like having to limp over to the elderly woman in a wheelchair who is stricken with MS as she hands you your medal. You come to the realization that what you went thru is nothing compared to what she has gone thru.

With that being said, its time to start winter training.
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************************************************
When did I lose my sense of purpose?
Can I regain what's lost inside?
Why do I feel like I deserve this?
Why does my pain look like my pride?
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