Castle Shima

Look! Its the four pillars of the male heterosexuality. We like 1) naked women, 2) stockings, 3) lesbians, and 4) Sean Connery best as James Bond. Why? Because that is what being a boy is! -- Steve from Coupling

Tower View
Once again, its been really hectic so I havent been able to post. Hopefully this really long post will make up for the past week.

The Obituary
A friend sent this to me. I had seen it before, but I forgotten the sadness I felt at this passing...

Today we mourn the passing of an old friend, Common Sense. Common Sense lived a long life, but died in the United States from heart failure early in the new millennium. No one really knows how old he was, since his birth records were lost long ago in bureaucratic red tape. He selflessly devoted his life to service in schools, hospitals, homes, and factories, helping folks get jobs done without fanfare and foolishness.

For decades, petty rules, silly laws, and frivolous lawsuits held no power over Common Sense. He was credited with cultivating such valued lessons as to know when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, and that life isn't always fair.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn), reliable parenting strategies (the adults are in charge, not the kids), and it's okay to come in second. A veteran of the Industrial Revolution, the Great Depression, and the Technological Revolution, Common Sense survived cultural and educational trends including body piercing, whole language, and "new math." But his health declined when he became infected with the "If-it-only-helps-one-person-it's-worth-it" virus.

In recent decades his waning strength proved no match for the ravages of well intentioned but overbearing regulations. He watched in pain as good people became ruled by self-seeking lawyers. His health rapidly deteriorated when schools endlessly implemented zero tolerance policies.

Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate, a teen suspended for taking a swig of mouthwash after lunch, and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student only worsened his condition.

It declined even further when schools had to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student but could not inform the parent when a female student was pregnant or wanted an abortion.

Common Sense lost his will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses, criminals received better treatment than victims, and federal judges stuck their noses in everything from the Boy Scouts to professional sports.

When an individual, too stupid to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, was awarded a huge settlement, Common Sense threw in the towel. As the end neared, Common Sense drifted in and out of logic but was kept informed of developments regarding questionable regulations such as those for low flow toilets, rocking chairs, stepladders and auto emissions.

Common Sense finally succumbed when, while the United States was fighting a war on terrorism, a federal judge declared the Pledge of Allegiance to be unconstitutional.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by two stepsiblings: My Rights, and Ima Whiner.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
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Wheel Away Part 1
This past weekend, I was taking my first major road trip for a cycling event. In order to get ready, my bicycle was going to have to get some major maintenance work done it.

One of the first things was that I replaced the saddle (aka seat) to a lighter, more aerodynamic one.

The second thing was that I had been debating about getting a new set of wheels. The current wheels were only a year old, but they were the cheap stock versions that came with the bike. They had been through so much that they were beginning to wobble and I had never really had them adjusted (called truing).

All the wheels I had been looking at would range from $300 for both to as high as $1000. Since I only paid $450 for the whole bike, getting the new wheels seemed out of the question.

When I took it into the shop, I asked the maintenance guy, Chris, if he could true the wheels as well as check out the brakes, chain, etc. I would leave it there for a couple of days, then come back to pick it up.

A few days later, when I returned, the other tech, Mike, said that Chris had left a note saying that my rear wheel couldnt be repaired. The rear wheel was warped enough to make it harder to fix rather than just buy a new one.

After cringing at that thought, I was relieved when Mike told me that a replacement was only $50. But then he says "But... I would recommend this set to replace both wheels."

I cringed again.

Mike begins showing this set of Neuvation wheels, black and red to match my bike, more rigid than the cheapies and more aerodymnamic.

They were so good that he has never had one returned except for the usual truing. They were so good that Motobecane was using them as their stock tires on their cheaper bicycles.

For Motobecane, a cheaper bicyle means its $800.

This was like putting on Porche wheels on a Volkswagon Passat.

I cringed again. Then I asked the obvious question.. "How much?"

His reply: "Normally they run $250, but since you spend so much here, I'll sell them to you for $230. I know its not a lot off, but thats how much we pay for them."

At that the price, this was too much of a deal to pass up.

I surrendered my soul and my credit card for these wheels. Best part, he was able to get the work done that day so I was able to pick up the bike on the way home from work.

When I got home, I realized that Mike had forgotten to put a part back onto my front wheel for my speedometer. I called him at the shop and double checked that he hadnt tossed out my old wheels yet.

Fortunately, he hadnt thrown them out yet and told me to come by in the morning on my way out of town. He would remove the clip off the old wheel, then put it back onto the new one.

So I rode the bike around the neighborhood to get a feel for the new tires. For the cost, they were everything Mike had said they would be. They were an absolute dream.

Wheel Away Part 2
The next morning, I walked into the shop, new wheel in hand, ready for Mike to put the speedometer clip on. The first thing he says as soon as I walk in: "Oh hey.. umm.. dude.. I need to show you something.."

I cringed.

Mike begins to show me the invoice screen on his register. If you looked at the link, like I did the night before, the wheels were listed was exactly as Mike noted: $250. The picture didnt quite match, but it was close enough.

The wheels he had installed where the good kind; the really.. good.. kind. The $500 kind.

I cringed and felt a pucker around the anal region. I had wondered if I had been caught in some kind of bait and switch.

Then I asked the obvious question "Do you need me to pay the rest of it?"

He replied "Nah, dont worry about it. I've sold three sets at $250 already and your's at the $230."

I felt the pucker relax abit as Mike told me about he would have never even noticed until he tried to order more of the wheels, that they were selling like mad. Thats when his boss tried to figure out why the rest of the stores couldnt sell them as fast.

Must have been the price... *cough*

Mike returned my clip to its proper place on the new wheel, then gave me my old wheels saying "Here. Hide the evidence."

The only thing I was worried about now was hopefully that Mike wouldnt lose his job over this. By my estimation, that was nearly $1000 lost in the sale of the wheels.

He said he would be ok. After all, he was one of the seniors techs and one of their better salesmen.

At prices like these, I can understand why. Hopefully, nothing will happen to Mike. He might have one of these sales again.
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And The Trip Itself?
After all that excitement (I know it wasnt *that* exciting, but it was for me), the cycling event was a bit more tame. We road 26 miles in the rain, enjoyed a buffet at a local restaurant, and had a good time was had by all.

On that note, I must have give kudos to Kelli.

What can be said about an attractive woman who likes sports, like shooting handguns, and even more so, willing to pull down her workout pants to show me her legs?

I tried talking her to going out with my buddy, Doombringer, who is in dire need of female companionship, but to no avail.

Why? Well, besides the fact that we are talking about Doom, there were some other reasons:

1) Kelli was showing the bruises she had gotten while moving. Not that attractive. 2) She's a cop and she carries more ammunition than I ever would. 3) She's gay. 4) She's in a relationship. 5) Did I mention Kelli was gay?

Granted, with her being a lesbian, Kelli does fall into one of the pillars of male heterosexuality and Doom gets a chance to dream, doesnt he?

Out in The Yard
Anne's blog has new look. She's even got a new picture out there which looks really good.
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US tech workers are the ones training their replacements. US companies are wanting us to train the cheaper labor so they can lay off the more expensive Americans. Something is wrong in that.
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Over half of Califorina voters would pick Schwarzenegger. After Gray Davis screwed things up, its no wonder that Arnold would be a front runner. If he doesnt like what someone has to say, he'll either shoot them or break them in half.

Granted, I wouldnt mind voting for Larry Flynt. I can see it now. "If I'm elected, I promise to have a naked woman in everyone's home.."

Background Noise
Get Down Tonight by K.C. And The Sunshine Band

Do a little dance...
Make a little love...
Get down tonight...
Get down tonight...

I'm still in that 70's mode.

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* I will never forget those nights.
* I wonder if it was a dream.
* Remember how you made me crazy?
* Remember how I made you scream?
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