Castle Shima

Hello, you've reached me. If you don't know who me is, you've dialed the wrong number.
-- From an answering machine message

::: Tower View :::
A List By Any Other Name
Once again, I'm blaming Angelia for this because she came up with a great idea. She's started another project based on lists. Lists of anything and everything that we could come up with. Its a really interesting concept...

Then I really liked the first one she came up with so I had to respond.
List all the greetings you've used to answer the telephone
- Hi. Now you say something.
- Good morning. Information Systems. This is Ken. What did you break?
- Mike's Mortuary. You stab em, we slab em.
- Yallo?!
- Hm?
- yes?
- What?!
- Mushimushi!
- Konichi wa!
- Pappa John's Pizza. We're abit busy at the moment. Please hold...
- Front desk. How may I direct your call?
- Hi, This is the Game Store. My name is Ken. No we dont have any Super Ninetendos left. Now how may help you?

So I sent her a suggestion and here is what I came up with...
List all unessential items sitting on your desk at the moment
- The snail mail for the past month
- Stack of reciepts
- Non-functional clock
- A ton of unopened software
- Photo negatives
- Used gift card to Ted's Montana Grill
- A twist tie for a loaf of bread
- The bottle cap to a Dasani bottle
- Empty cd jewel cases
- Empty cd paper sleeves
- The broken ear piece to an old pair of eyeglasses
- Lens cleaning cloth
- Two empty soda cans
- Bottle of aspirin
- A coaches' whistle
- A scrunchy
- A LiveStrong bracelet
- Stack of backup dvds *cough*
- Toy Dragon
- Sun visor
- Stack of arcade tokens
- Empty MP3 player case
- Two tubes of Anbesol
- Box of Kleenex
- Sports watch with semi-broken strap
- Installation instructions for bicycle cyclometer
- Various video game manuals
- A City of Heroes playing card. ("Statesman" to be specific
- Phone battery that doesnt fit any of my phones
- 25 foot USB cable still in it package and unopened
- Empty case to flash card

Damn, I'm a frigging pack rat... So what is on your desk?

By the way, Angelia, I cant leave comments on your new blog. Stupid Xanga.

Anyways, we really need to talk. Garter strap, brownies, and RPG materials?! What exactly were you doing last night, hm? LOL...
**********

::: Out In The Yard :::
Man wounded while playing with handgun in bathroom. Most men prefer to play with their own weapon while in the bathroom.
**********

::: Background Noise :::
Hash Pipe by Weezer

Come on and kick me
You've got your problems
I've got my ass wide
You've got your big G's
I've got my hash pipe

There is something severely wrong with those lyrics...

*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************