Shut Up, Hippy!
-- seen on a bumper sticker
::: Tower View :::
Terms Of Service
Geez, I've really been gone for awhile. So to make up for it, I can finally divulge the details of my jury duty. This will take a couple of days because it could practically be a book.
You've been warned.
**********
Voir Dire
As much as people dispise this obligation, I will be the first to admit that this had to be one of the best experiences I've had. Mainly because the damn thing was funny from beginning to end which is why this is going to take some time.
I reported to the courthouse on the Monday morning as requested. The city does a pretty good job in that there is one central location for all potenital jurorists to park and the city pays for a shuttle to bring people back and forth. Normally, a juror goes thru one case and finds out if they are chosen. If they are chosen, then they are told to come back later in the week to serve.
Those that arent chosen are sent home. Job done.
After filling all the necessary paperwork and watching the silly video on jury duty, The first group is called together. I'm number two on the list. The first thought on my mind was "Frig! I'm royally screwed now!"
There are 18 of us called into a courtroom and the one sitting next to me was a younger guy who obviously was just too busy to be inconvienced. I think it was the comment of "Man, if I gotta lie to get out of this bullshit, then I'll do it!"
He really must be a really busy type of guy. After all, he couldnt have been bothered to have tucked in the dingy white tshirt under his wrinkled animal print shirt.
The first step any jury is to do called Voir Dire. This is when both sets of the lawyers ask the jurors questions in order to determine who they want or dont want to stay. I was quite proud to state my name, occupation, and how long I had lived here. After all, I'm a semi-respectable citizen of the community. Thats my story and I'm sticking to it.
The busy body next declared that this name was Redman and that he was a manager at Hardees. I now refuse to eat there for any reason.
After everyone tells who they are, the potential jury is told that this a civil case brought on by the state and the defendant was actually to be called the Respondant. The questions may be abit more adult oriented and may come upon touchy subjects such as sex and violence.
Thats when the though hits me: Sex?! Perk!! What is this all about?! Woohoo! Apparently, I've been watching Law And Order: Special Victims Unit abit too much.
There are two female lawyers for the State and they go thru there progression of questions for everyone. There are questions about how we feel about sexual offenders, sexual violence, and molestors. A few make it known that they cant be too objective as either they were victims or knew someone who was a victim.
One question asked was Would you have a problem deciding if someone should go to jail? to which Redman shot his hand up and yelped "Yes, I do!" When the State attorney asked him why, he replied "I've got alot of relatives in jail already!"
He began whispering to me "Yes! I'm going home! I'm going home!".
When the Respondant's lawyer began asking questions, Redman's hand continuously shot up.
"Have you or anyone close you ever been charged with a sexual offense?"
"Yep! My uncle! He done got seven years!"
"Have you or anyone close you ever been charged with a drug abuse?"
"Yep! My mom!"
After awhile, the Respondant's lawyer, Mr. Flechman, would just say "Thank you, Mr. Redman. I think we got you."
So every few mins, Redman would again whisper gleefully "Yes! I'm going home! I'm going home!".
At one point, the Flechman asked if anyone knew what actuarial tables were. I responded that I knew what they were and had worked with due to my employment as a computer programmer with an insurance company. Then Red would whisper Ooo! You're going home! You're going home!
It was like this for the entire 2 hour process except for when Redman had fallen asleep and began snoring. Loud. Then snorted himself awake which even made me giggle softly. I was amazed that the judge didnt toss him out for contempt.
With every question concerning the thoughts about sex, incarceration, violence, and drugs, my interest was actually piqued. I really wanted to be on this one.
The State lawyer even asked "Do you have any issue with harsh language? Do you have a problem with someone telling you, pardon my language, that they are going f*ck you?" I almost blurted out Are you kidding?! I practically beg women to tell me that!
Around 10:30am, all of the jurors were released for a 15 minute break in order for the lawyers and judge to discuss who would stay and who would go. All the way out the door, Redman continued his chant "I'm going home! I'm going home!". He practically did the Happy Dance going out the courtroom. Then again, he was doing the Happy Dance when we back came in.
After being seated, the judge spoke to us, stating that while some of us will be picked for this trial, the ones that were not picked shouldnt be offended because they could be a good juror for another trial. So those who were called would remain while those left over would return to the main hall in order to be picked for a different trial.
Redman's jaw dropped for a moment while I stiffled a snicker, my mind thinking "You arent going home! You arent going home!" Hehehe...
My name was called and I was in.
Redman collected himself and mumbled "That's ok. I'll lie to them too. I dont need this shit." Then off he went. Obviously, Hardee's needs him back in a hurry because I sure as hell wouldnt want him to be in jury with me.
With the others gone, we were down to 7 jurors and we found out when the trial would begin.
Right then and there...
To Be Continued
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Barter your paper clip for a house. Now I could afford that kind of mortgage.
**********
Goths prone to suicide. Ugh, such depressing news... everything is so black...
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Party Up by DMX
Listen
Your ass is about to be missing!
You know who gonna find you?
Who?
Some old man fishing!
Grandma wishing your soul's at rest,
But its hard to digest
With the size of the hole in your chest
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Even with my eyes wide open, I cant see a thing.
-- from the movie Zatoichi
::: Tower View :::
I'm sorry I havent been around much again. Its been hectic at the Castle. And before I forget again, a belated happy birthday goes out to Methos...
What Do You See?
For this week, I find myself in jury duty. Although I cant go into details of the trial as of yet, but the courthouse's snack bar has provided enough excitement as it is.
This morning, I went in to pick up a bottle of water and a chocolate bar. As I stood there at the counter, waiting for the cashier to ring me up, I watched as he folded up the cash from the previous person and place it in the register.
As I stood there waiting patiently, I noticed the cashier peering right at me.
I cough gently and he says "Oh, sorry. What can I get you?" I reply "Just these" and point to the water and candy. Then the cashier turns his head slightly and asks "What do you have?"
I peer closer and notice he has hearing aids in both ears. I thought that was abit strange for such a young man, but simply replied in a louder tone of voice "Just these things..." while pointing to the stuff I want.
The puzzled look on his face began to frustrate me. I began thinking how could they let this guy work here?!
Suddenly a voice behind me rang out "He's got one bottle of water and one candy bar."
Thats when I noticed the sign behind the cashier:
Cashier is blind! Tell him what you are buying and how many! Thanks!
There is the same sign is sitting under my purchases.
So as the sudden feeling of stupidity washed over me, I apologize to the cashier, state that the voice was correct, and hand over my money. I turned around to the gentleman behind me, who obviously worked in the building, and thanked him.
Its always the smallest things that make us feel the worst.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Take a trip across the country by bicycle. Time to mount up!
**********
Father vidoe game with son. Hilarity ensues. This is just wrong. Funny, but wrong. (hat tip: Sybil)
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy by Big & Rich
Cause I saddle up my horse and ride him thru the city
I make alot of noise
Cause all the girls they are so pretty
Riding up and down broadway on my old stud Leroy
And the girls say
Save a horse, ride a cowboy!
I know its a country song, but its pretty damn catchy. LOL...
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Me: I really need to be careful about what I say here.
Aimee: Dont worry, Ken. If you are around me, sexual harrassment isnt a problem, but I do grade on technique.
-- from a conversation at work
::: Tower View :::
Back Into The Fold
So I've been out of the loop for some time. With work, being ill, allergies, computer issues, and the cycling team, its amazing I actually had been getting four hours of sleep a day.
And to be honest, there hasnt been anything to interesting other than the typical innuendo going around the office.
Oh! I could suck all the stuff out of that one!
One second. Let stick this in my mouth.
I love the taste of that, but I always end up wiping it off of my face.
Let me spread this open...
Damn it! I stick this huge package in and nothing happened. Nothing came out!
I need to get my hands around it.
Well, you are just going to have to find a way to fit it in. Just shove in there.
Frig. This is what I get for working around a bunch of women.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Floyd Landis wins at Paris-Nice! Landis may only be the second American to win this classic race, but its yet another one that the French cant win. Hehehe...
**********
::: Background Noise :::
In The Air Tonight by Nonpoint
I can feel it come in the air tonight
Oh lord
I been waiting for this moment
For all my life
Oh lord...
A decent cover of the original Phil Collins song. First heard this on the Coach Carter soundtrack.
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
All good things must come to an end, but all bad things can continue forever.
-- Anonymous
::: Background Noise :::
Being the epitome of laziness tonight, this is the best that I can offer.
How Soon Is Now by The Psychodelic Furs
I am the son
And the heir
Of a shyness that is criminally vulgar
I am the son
And the heir
Of nothing in particular
You shut your mouth
How can you say
I go about things the wrong way
I am human and I need to be loved
Just like everybody else does
There's a club
If you like to go
You could meet somebody who really loves you
So you go
And you stand on your own
And you leave on your own
And you go home
And you cry
And you want to die
When you say its going to happen now
Well when exactly do you mean?
See I've already waited too long
And all my hope is gone
This is the cover of The Smiths version, but I prefer this one ever since I heard it as the intro song to the tv show Charmed.
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Babies don't need a vacation but I still see them at the beach. I'll go over to them and say "What are you doing here, you've never worked a day in your life!".
-- Steven Wright
::: Tower View :::
Call The Office
I am at the office when I receive a phone call from a lass I hadnt heard from in a year. Apparently she had some news for me.
Her: Ken, I recently had a daughter and you're the father.
Me: What the hell?! What are you talking about?!
Her: You have a daughter. She has Asian eyes so I know she is yours.
Me: You know, this isnt funny.
Her: I'm completely serious, Ken. She has the most pretty Asian eyes.
Me: There is no way she is mine!
Her: She has to be your daughter, Ken. I've only been with one Asian man and she has Asian eyes.
Me: Damn it, Mei Ling! There is no way that girl is mine!
...And if you didnt laugh at that one, then you must be blonde. Just like Nancy at office who required me and three other people to explain the joke to her.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Playboy is now offering subscriptions to students. Where was this when I was a kid?!
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Talk Talk by Talk Talk
You're laughing at me when I'm up
I see you when you're crying
For me when I'm down
I see you when you're laughing
For me when I'm up
I see you when you're crying for me
All you do to me is talk talk
Talk Talk
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.
-- Harlan Ellison
::: Tower View :::
It Wasnt Me This Time
Recently, our company found out that someone in the Information Technology (IT) division broke some major rules and got himself fired.
Since I happen to work in the IT division, this had to be some serious offense. The only way for an IT person to get fired is if they were doing work for another company at the office, watching p()rn, doing day trading, or stealing data.
When this person got sacked, it made the rumour mills throughout the company.
What was even worse was the voice mail I got from a friend in another division:
Hey! If you are still working here, call me back. I just wanted to find out if they finally caught you yet.
Sheesh. Thanks for the faith.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Boom! Now I've been bored and out of beer, but damn...
**********
Time to bring the pain, baby! Terry Tate always did rock. We need a few more of him around the office.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Drive by The Cars
Who's going to hold you down
When you shake?
Who's going to come around
When you break?
You cant go on
Thinking nothing's wrong
Who's going to drive you home tonight?
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.
-- Charlie Brown
::: Tower View :::
Happy Heart Day
Some of the most romantic movies for the day:
Say Anything - Because I am Lloyd Dobler
Eat Drink Man Woman - Before Brokeback Mountain, Ang Lee made this gem about an old chef dealing with the love lives of his three daughters.
When Harry Met Sally - Deli scene. Nuff said.
Sleepless In Seattle - Meg Ryan. Wanting another deli scene. Nuff said.
You've Got Mail - Meg Ryan. Wanting another deli scene. Nuff said.
**********
Birthday Wishes
First to Doombringer: We didnt forget you, sir! You just happen to be in the wrong state!
Second to Gi: As much as you wanted to do it, you couldnt forget your birthday. Hehe...
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
She actually asked "Are you sure?!" I wonder if she also believed the line "I'll tap your head just before it happens..".
**********
Just a little shooting going on. Proving once again, I happen to live in the wrong place. Heh...
**********
Time to find a curry and rice girl. Damn. I need to send this to Jay... Bwahahaha...
**********
For those that are considering children. If this doesnt convince you, then nothing will.
**********
The Aussie group Tripod performing live here. There is hope for us geeks still.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Everything by Lifehouse
How can I stand here with you
And not be moved by you?
And you tell me
How could it be any better than this?
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Aimee: I'm leaving for the day. I actually get to see my husband during the daytime.
Robbie: Wont that make his girlfriend mad?
-- from a conversation at work
::: Tower View :::
Random Shots
I'm being lazy so this is the best I can do for now. Abit of random thoughts fired across the bow...
1) Fury sent me this article about the office spouses. Its no wonder Gi and I get along so well.
2) Lance and Sheryl broke up?! There is no hope for the rest of the world.
3) Wok Seared Lamb from P.F. Changs Mmmm...
4) And just to represent this past week...
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Time for some burgers. I drive this way too... hehe...
**********
::: Background Noise :::
I'm With You by Avril Lavigne
Isnt anyone trying to find me?
Wont somebody come take me home
Its a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Wont you take me by the hand
Take me somewhere new
I dont know who you are
But I
I'm with you
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
We don't stop playing because we grow old. We grow old because we stop playing.
-- George Bernard Shaw
::: Tower View :::
I Refuse To Grow Up
You Are 26 Years Old |
 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax. |
cough bullsh*t cough...
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Jill Hennessy talks about the things she loves. She wants me. She may not know it yet, but she wants me.
**********
The latest in floatation devices are on display here. Must not stare.. must not stare...
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Re-Arranged by Limp Bizkit
Lately I've been skeptical
Silent when I would used to speak
Distant from all around me
Who witness me fail and become weak
Life is overwhelming
Heavy is the head that wears the crown
I'd love to be the one to
Disappoint you when I dont fall down
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Kobe Bryant scored 81 points in the Lakers' 122-104 win over the Raptors on Sunday night, the second-highest total in NBA history. It's by far the most Kobe has ever scored without having to buy his wife a diamond afterward.
-- Pete McEntegart, writer for Sports Illustrated
::: Tower View :::
Damn You're Old
First order of business for this eve is to say Happy Birthday to Angelia. I was trying to figure out where to send the senior citizens discout card, but then she threatened me with a sharp pointy stick...
So no cake for Ken..! Instead she got even with me. See below...
**********
Tagged And Bagged
So I got bloody well tagged yet again. I've been getting tagged so much lately that I should have one of the little slips of paper hanging off my left ear with a GPS tracker inserted inside the skin of my bum...
Here is tonight's list, but you may not find the answers you were looking for. Ha!
1) What is your middle name? [CLASSIFIED]
2) What size is your bed? I dont have a bed. I sleep on the floor.
3) What are you listening to? Broken by Seether and Amy Lee
4) What are the last two digits of your phone #? 1 and 4
5) What is the last thing you ate? Wendy.. err.. I mean Wendy's fries
6) Last person you hugged? Men dont hug, we embrace. For a really long time.
7) How is the weather right now? Frigging cold.
8) Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? The answering machine voice.
9) What's the first thing you notice about the opposite/same sex? Eyes
10) Do you have a bf/gf ? Wouldnt this involve someone actually liking me being around?
11) Ok, who the frig took #11??
12) Do you drink? No, but I've seriously begun to think about it.
13) Have you ever gotten so drunk that you don't remember the entire nite? Aye, hence my current attitude.
14) Hair color? Black
15) Eye color? Brown
16) Fav baseball team? The best thing about baseball season is that it ends!
17) Fav animal? Dogs
18) Favorite season? Fall
19) Ever cried for no reason? Men dont cry. We just have slight drops of water departing our eyes from time to time.
20) Last movie you watched? Underworld Evolution
21) What book are you reading? Hellblazer: Red Sepuchre by Mike Carey
22) Piercings? one in my left ear
23) Favorite movie? Akira, Fist of Legend
24) Fav college team? None truly. I did notice Angelia said OSU and would have to say that we all like some Beaver...
25) What are you doing right now? Grumbling like mad hatter.
26) Pets? Yes, I do tend to pet when the time arises. Why?
27) Dog or cats? Dogs.. Cats taste better, but not as much meat on the bones.
28) Favorite flower? Snapdragon
29) Have you ever been caught doing something you weren't supposed to be doing? Its my job.
30) Have you ever loved someone? Absolutely
31) Who would you like to see right now? Jenna Jameson; she has some really nice big round.. umm.. eyes..
32) Are you still friends with your ex's? At times.
33) Have you ever fired a gun? Yes, and if my neighbors keep f**king up, I'll fire it some more times.
34) Do you like to travel by plane? Absolutely
35) Right handed or left handed? Depends on what I'm doing at the time...
36) If you could be with someone right now, who would it be? Jenna Jameson; she has some really huge.. ummm.. tracts of land...
37) How many pillows you sleep with? None. You assume I sleep on a bed.
38) Are you missing someone? yes
39) Do you have a tattoo? Two of them.
40) Do you watch cartoons on Sat. mornings? No; Justice League Unlimited isnt until Sat night.
41) Are you hiding something from someone? Of course. Its the best thing I do.
42) Do you play an instrument? Well, I've never called it an instrument, but sure...
Now I have to tag a few other victims. So Fury, Chloe, Axe, and Bobby.
Of course they have the option of not doing this, but you will be cursed like those mass emails always say. Hehe..
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Engineer rides bicycle modified with rocket engine. Dont we have these things already? They're called motorcycles!
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Over The Hills And Far Away by Night Wish
Over the hills and far away
For ten long years
He'll count the days
Over the mountains and the seas
A prisoner's life for him there'll be
This version is more of a dance mix, but I remember first hearing this song from Sharpe's Rifles
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Dont ask. To know about the Giggle Loop is to become part of the Giggle Loop.
-- Jeff from Coupling
::: Tower View :::
There Is Nothing Funny About It
Ever been to hear an Asian pastor give a birthday toast?
It becomes a 10 minute sermon with a large amount of reverence combined with a lot of "Ums" and "Errs." It reminds me of a southern baptist preacher with a heavy accent. He has absolutely no idea what he is discussing and finds himself repeating over and over again...
...with the people around him saying alot of Amen! along the way.
So the most inappropriate thing you can do at a time like that is to laugh. Thus begins the Giggle Loop.
You arent supposed to laugh and you think "Dear God! Dont let me laugh." Then it slightly slips out. A soft chuckle.
So you step away for a moment to prevent everyone from seeing this occurring. When you step back, thinking you are in control, another chuckle slips out.
"Damn it! You arent supposed to laugh!"
...and you step away again to prevent from laughing out aloud...
Then the Ava Maria singing began and the cycle occurs again...
Which explains why I had to stay in the kitchen during the entire toast at my uncle's birthday party last night.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Super Pacman beats Morales in 10 rounds! This was one excellent fight, unless you are a fan of Erik Morales. Bang! Bang!
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Every Time You Cry by The Outfield
Every time you cry
I cry just a little bit
Cry just a little bit
When you say good bye
I die just a little bit
Cry just a little bit
Just a little bit more
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Ray: What is the deal with all the blue balls?
Me: Perhaps its an indication of things to come.
-- from a conversation at work
::: Tower View :::
Pardon Me
Its been that kind of week.
Between the stress, frustration, and just plain exhaustion, I thought I've been hearing things. Apparently not. I've just been taking them out of context; As usual.
"Gee, thats a big one."
"There is no way that will fit in there."
"I like to spread them out for everyone."
"He pulled it out and thats all she wrote.."
"It wouldnt fit in my mouth..."
"Oh, I just kept working on it until it went all the way down..."
I must have lost my mind somewhere along the way.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Naked woman poses with car at show. Heh, that would make me want to buy it.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Enter Sandman by Metallica
Exit light
Enter night
Grain of sand
Take my hand
off to never, never land...
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Mrs. Beaver: You've been sneaking second helpings, havent you?
Mr. Beaver: Well, you never know if your next meal's going to be your last. Especially with your cooking.
-- from The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe
::: Tower View :::
Oh Yeah? Name Two
Yet again, I've "appropriated" a list from Angelia. Somehow I found this one pretty close to home, but then again, dont I find them all that way? She called it a way to express the inner self. I would say that its a way to put my thoughts down in some kind of order, rather than the blatent rambling I do constantly.
So without further ado...
Two Names You Go By
1. Ken
2. You Bastard! (Thats only if you've been married to me at one point in your life)
Two Parts Of Your Heritage
1. Mom
2. Dad
Two Things That Scare You
1. Dying alone
2. Heights
Two Of Your Everyday Essentials
1. My computer
2. My music
Two Things You Are Wearing Right Now
1. Black ring with red dragon emblem
2. Grey ESPN shirt
Two Of Your Favorite Bands Or Musical Artists (At The Moment)
1. Linkin Park
2. Green Day
Two Of Your Favorite Songs (At The Moment)
1. The Hard Way - Fort Minor
2. Leaving Me Now - Level 42
Two Things You Want In A Relationship (Other Than Real Love)
1. A gentle soul
2. Humour (Laughter is a good one too)
Two Truths
1. The memories flash across my eyes more than ever.
2. I wondered what this world would be if I wasnt in it.
Two Physical Things That Appeal To You
1. Eyes
2. Hair
Two Of Your Favorite Hobbies
1. Bicycling
2. Video games
Two Things You Want Really Badly
1. My soulmate
2. To find somewhere I belong
Two Places You Want To Go On Vacation
1. Ireland
2. Germany
Two Things You Want To Do Before You Die
1. Have my own family
2. Cycle the mountains the Europe
Two Ways That You Are Stereotypically a Dude/Chick
1. I like to ogle females.
2. One word: Pron...
Two Ways You Act Like The Opposite Sex?
1. I like to shop.
2. I am a romantic.
Two Things You Are Thinking About Now
1. Roses
2. Earrings
Two Stores You Shop At Often
1. EB Games
2. Performance Cycling
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Vampire wants to pin Jesse "The Body" Ventura. No biting allowed! Ask Mike Tyson about that...
**********
::: Background Noise :::
For You by The Outfield
I was wrong
My mistake
I regret
Look at the price I paid
Take these words
Understand
Try to forgive me
I'm a broken man.
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Now I'm just like the bastards I've hated all me life.
-- John Constantine, Rake at the Gates of Hell
::: Tower View :::
The Have Nots
If I remember correctly, Chloe tagged me with this. So I guess I had best answer.
Four jobs you've never had in your life:
Pimp
Loan Collections
Politician
Race Car Driver (I do this for free!)
Four movies you don't want to watch even once:
The Notebook
Brokeback Mountain
Rumor Has It
Any movie by Michael Moore
Four places you've never lived:
Berlin
Paris
Moscow
Vermont (Does anyone truly live there as opposed to survive?)
Four television shows you've never watched:
Trading Spouse
The OC
24
Desperate Housewives
For places you've never been on vacation:
Dublin
Amsterdam
Portland, Or
Seatlle, Wa
Four of your least favorite foods:
Brussel Sprouts
Blood pudding
Goat
Asparagus
Four places you'd rather not be:
The office (lately)
Jail
Africa
Miami, Fl (I'm Asian, damn it! Not cuban!)
Four albums (cds) you can live without:
(with apologies to L&L...)
Anything by Rascal Flats
Anything by Travis Tritt
Anything with the words Honky Tonk in it...
Anything by Kayne West (jackass..)
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Super Saiyans battle with Linkin Park. For the Dragonball Z fans...
**********
The Asian Backstreet Boys strike again. I really need to find out who their choreographer is...
**********
This gives a new meaning to girls on film. I'm all for girl on girl action, but damn...
**********
There are times when doing the treadmill is just too much. Ummm... Ow...
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Natural One by Folk Implosion
I'm the one
Natural one
Take it easy
We can take it inside
I can have it
Because I act like I love it
Its a matter of pride
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Dont take any sh*t from anybody!
-- Billy Joel
::: Tower View :::
The First Time
No matter how old we are, we always remember that first time. It was an event in our lifetime that impacted how we handled things in the future. And for me, that time has occurred with Angelia.
Why not? After all, I've been accused of having something for her. So it seems fitting that she be my first.
...To have filled out my Comments section...
I didnt even know I had a comments section! I finally got a chance to work on the blog when I stumbled upon a comment Angelia entered last month (and a really good one I might add). After going thru a few other posts, I discovered she had been putting other comments out into the world.
So I owe you an apology, Angelia. I wasnt ignoring you, dear one. Things just happened so quickly that it was over before I knew what to do. Was it good for you as it was for me? It'll get better with more experience, I swear.
With that being said, I've updated the blog slightly for comments and such.
Now get your minds out of the gutter. Grab mine while you are there, please.
**********
Link Lists
1) My copy of Post Secret finally came in. Its a great book and I highly recommend it.
2) Its funny see the video for All American Rejects song Dirty Little Secrets. They used cards from Post Secret as part of the video.
3) I was recently talked into the going to the Billy Joel concert. Despite his age, the show was still pretty good. The man can rock.
4) It was inspiring hearing the entire arena sing Piano Man with the band. A moment of joy was felt by all.
5) I could really use a drink right now.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
The AVN Pron Awards are almost as big as the Oscars nowadays. And where else can you have a catagory like Best Actress In A Double Penetration?
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Shout 2000 by Disturbed
Shout
Shout
Let it all out
These are the things that I can do without
Come on
I'm talking to you
So come on...
This was the first time I heard this cover and I have to admit, its pretty damn good.
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
* Click the time below to post comments
*******************************************************
Football Is an honest game. It's true to life . It's a game about sharing. Football is a team game. So is life.
-- Joe Namath
::: Tower View :::
Latest Pictorial
I've finally gotten around to offloading the pictures from the holidays. Aye, I know. I'm a lazy sod.
So here are some of my favorites...
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
The Asian version of the Backstreet Boys have arrived. I've missed my calling.
**********
The Wulin Warriors are coming!. I wanted to say Thunderbirds are go!, but realized I was in the wrong country. (hat tip: Puppet Vision)
**********
GLAAD mad at bad review of dumb movie. Your opinion is very important to us. Unless we dont like comments, then of which, we will collect your f%^king head.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life) by Green Day
So take the photographs
And still frames in your mind
Hang it on a shelf
In good health and good time
Tattoos of memories
And dead skin on trial
For what it's worth
It was worth all the while
Its something unpredictable
But in the end its right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Have the courage to live. Anyone can die.
-- Robert Cody
::: Tower View :::
You've Got Personality
Hat tip to Fury
| Your Personality Is |
You are sensible, down to earth, and goal oriented. Bottom line, you are good at playing by the rules. You tend to be dominant - and you are a natural leader. You are interested in rules and order. Morals are important to you. A hard worker, you give your all at whatever you do. You're very serious, and people often tell you to lighten up. In love, you tend to take things carefully and slowly. At work, you are suited to almost any career - but you excel in leadership positions. With others, you tend to be polite and formal. As far as looks go, you are traditionally attractive. You take good care of yourself. On weekends, you tend to like to do organized activities. In fact, you often organize them! |
They forgot to include that I'm a complete bastard.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Police arrest robber with help from his license plate. You have to be a frigging idiot when your plate says FINDME
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Good Is Good by Sheryl Crow
I dont hold no mystery
But I can show you how to turn the key
Cause all I know is where I started
So downhearted
And thats not where you want to be
And everytime you hear the rolling thunder
You turn around before the lightening strikes
And you could find a rock to crawl right under
If all your good times pass you by
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Hello, you've reached me. If you don't know who me is, you've dialed the wrong number.
-- From an answering machine message
::: Tower View :::
A List By Any Other Name
Once again, I'm blaming Angelia for this because she came up with a great idea. She's started another project based on lists. Lists of anything and everything that we could come up with. Its a really interesting concept...
Then I really liked the first one she came up with so I had to respond.
List all the greetings you've used to answer the telephone
- Hi. Now you say something.
- Good morning. Information Systems. This is Ken. What did you break?
- Mike's Mortuary. You stab em, we slab em.
- Yallo?!
- Hm?
- yes?
- What?!
- Mushimushi!
- Konichi wa!
- Pappa John's Pizza. We're abit busy at the moment. Please hold...
- Front desk. How may I direct your call?
- Hi, This is the Game Store. My name is Ken. No we dont have any Super Ninetendos left. Now how may help you?
So I sent her a suggestion and here is what I came up with...
List all unessential items sitting on your desk at the moment
- The snail mail for the past month
- Stack of reciepts
- Non-functional clock
- A ton of unopened software
- Photo negatives
- Used gift card to Ted's Montana Grill
- A twist tie for a loaf of bread
- The bottle cap to a Dasani bottle
- Empty cd jewel cases
- Empty cd paper sleeves
- The broken ear piece to an old pair of eyeglasses
- Lens cleaning cloth
- Two empty soda cans
- Bottle of aspirin
- A coaches' whistle
- A scrunchy
- A LiveStrong bracelet
- Stack of backup dvds *cough*
- Toy Dragon
- Sun visor
- Stack of arcade tokens
- Empty MP3 player case
- Two tubes of Anbesol
- Box of Kleenex
- Sports watch with semi-broken strap
- Installation instructions for bicycle cyclometer
- Various video game manuals
- A City of Heroes playing card. ("Statesman" to be specific
- Phone battery that doesnt fit any of my phones
- 25 foot USB cable still in it package and unopened
- Empty case to flash card
Damn, I'm a frigging pack rat... So what is on your desk?
By the way, Angelia, I cant leave comments on your new blog. Stupid Xanga.
Anyways, we really need to talk. Garter strap, brownies, and RPG materials?! What exactly were you doing last night, hm? LOL...
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Man wounded while playing with handgun in bathroom. Most men prefer to play with their own weapon while in the bathroom.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Hash Pipe by Weezer
Come on and kick me
You've got your problems
I've got my ass wide
You've got your big G's
I've got my hash pipe
There is something severely wrong with those lyrics...
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Men like dogs because we always need a friend who is dumber than we are. Women would like dogs, but they've already got men.
-- Bill Engvall
::: Tower View :::
This Is Happy?
Over the holidays, Adnil sent out pictures of the latest addition to her family; a wee pug pup. Apparently, he is really happy when he is in the garden. 
Damn. If this is happy, I would hate to see him when he's pissed.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Now you too can sleep with Elliot Stabler. I would have preferred Olivia Benson myself.. heh... (hat tip: Gizmodo)
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Then The Morning Comes by Smash Mouth
The way that you are
Its just the way that you talk
Like it aint no thing
And every single day is
Just a fling
Then the morning comes
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot. Unless, of course, those tests come back positive
-- Jay Leno
::: Tower View :::
Happy New Year To All
And to all a good night. Wait.. that didnt really belong there, did it?
Suffice it to say, here's hoping that your new year is safe.
And not to brag or anything, but here is a picture of the some slut I picked up. At least cleanliness wasnt an issue. Heh... 
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Flutie finds the lost art of the drop kick. Doug just proves that we are as young as we feel.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
After The Storm by The Outfield
After the hurt
Has gone away
Oh will we feel the pain
After the storm
Begins to turn
Oh will we ever learn
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Allie: Apparently, I'm not a master baster...
Me: I bet your husband doesnt think that!
-- from a conversation at lunch
::: Tower View :::
Tagged And Bagged
This is Angelique's fault. She tagged me for the game and I'm honour-bound to respond. Granted, I dont have comments so this will get a little wierd.
These are the rules of the game: You must write a journal entry listing those weirdnesses you possess ~ as well as the rules of the game. Then, you select five people to tag and link their names/blogs in your entry. Go to their journals and leave a comment informing them they have been tagged by you and to read your journal to see in what way they have been nailed! Those five then MUST write an entry listing their weird habits and tag an additional five people.
Aye.. like that is going to happen. Heh.
So here at least are my five wierdest habits:
1. Whenever I am in a car, I have the tendency to sing. It doesnt matter if I'm driving or not, if I know the song, I'll sing. Many times my friends have been the poor victims of my voice.
2. I laugh abit too loudly to the point of annoyance.
3. Ironically enough, like Angelique, I try not to wear yellow unless its a cycling jersey. I've been tol that it makes me look abit too yellow. This must be due to our heritage.
4. Whenever I get irritated, I tend to self-righteous. Which probably explains my bouts of road rage...
5. I'm the one that people hate while in the movie theater because I'll let comments slip out... on purpose. For example, thrity minutes into The Sixth Sense, I had whispered abit too loudly "I bet he's dead too. He keeps wearing the same clothes over and over again."
Hmmm.. I think my five victims will be:
Fury - it'll be fun
Ric - it'll give him something to do
Bobby - it'll be a little different for him
Chloe - she's done these before...sort of...
Anna - because I still blame her for the Chewbacca thing. Heh.
Of course, it'll be up to them to actually do this, but for now... TAG! YOU'RE IT!
**********
Watching A Little TV
Jay from the office showed us the way Ping Pong should be played. Matrix style!
So I got nosey and started looking at the other videos. The ones I found were pretty frigging funny...
Here is another reminder that the Internet is for porn, with a little help from World of Warcraft.
This one is of the Japanese pop group, Morning Musume playing Fear Factor with a lizard. I still have no idea what the hell is on their head.
Also from Japan comes the story of the Freshmen out to stop an evil plot to destroy the world. But does the villan really know who he is?
And finally, here is acapella at its best. I have a feeling that only the old time video game players will get the jokes, but its still pretty good. It came out during the summer and is definately one of the best videos this year.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
The latest in car alarms: Big Ben. Get away from the car, motherf**ker!
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Big Time by Peter Gabriel
I've had enough
I'm getting out
To the city
The big big city
I'll be a big noise
With all the big boys
There's so much stuff I will own
And I will pray
To a big god
As I kneel in the big church
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesnt work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me. --
-- Emo Philips
::: Tower View :::
Want A Piece?
You scored 3 Power-Finesse, 3 Leader-Follower, 1 Unique-Ordinary, and 2 Offense-Defense!
You are devoted to the cause, and you protect the interests of the Black team. You will often be working behind the scenes, protecting even the lowliest pawn. However, you are impossible to ignore, since at any moment you could strike like the black widow. It is more in your nature to allow your opponent to make a foolish mistake that you exploit, than it is for you to try and force an aggressive victory for your team.
The What Chess Piece Are You Test
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Here is the story of Fred The Baker. We'll always know when its time to make the doughnuts.
**********
Boyfriend shoves cell phone down girlfriend's throat. Thats one way to check her gag reflex.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
First I'm Gonna Crawl by DMX
Every day we live and learn
Take it step by step
And we create our own path
Until there's no life left
I hold my death off
For as long as I can
Knowing my man
Is plotting with the chrome in his hand
*******************************************************
* But I'm a creep
* I'm a weirdo
* What the hell am I doing here?
* I dont belong here
*******************************************************
Why is Christmas just like a day at the office? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
-- Anonymous
::: Tower View :::
Its Santa Day!
From Clan Shima to you and yours, have a Merry Christmas! Stay safe!
**********
*******************************************************
* Where are you
* And I'm so sorry
* I cannot sleep
* I cannot dream tonight
*******************************************************
You wanna be Chinese, you got to eat the nasty stuff.
-- Nick Chen from The Corruptor
::: Tower View :::
Reminders Of Hospital Food
Since I'm from Asian heritage, its not uncommon for me to see strange looking food. Its actually bit expected. Whenever I took my Caucasian friends to a gathering, I always told them that if they couldnt recognize it, then dont eat it. It would be hard enough to explain that "Blood pudding" really wasnt made out of blood, although it did look like it.
Robbie and Jay talked me into going to lunch to a local Indian buffet place. Not a Native American restaurant, mind you, but as in India.
I've been there before and normally can identify the food on the line. I guess today was a special occasion because the only thing I could recognize was the white rice.
There was extremely green stuff followed by some really, really yellow stuff. Then there was the yellow and white stuff that someone mentioned as to having yogurt in it. Oh, and there was the deep red stuff that apparently was some kind of goat mixture.
I think the cook was offended when I asked what part of the goat they used for that concoction.
Suffice it to say, the rice and the items identified as chicken made it to the plate.
**********
Letter To The Office
It was time for the annual message to the team at the office so here is what I sent.
As another year will shortly be a memory, my heartfelt appreciation goes out to all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me forwarded email over the past 12 months. Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy.
Extra thanks for the ones that I have to open 15 times to get to the message.
Special thanks to whomever sent me the one about rat droppings in the glue on envelopes because I now have to go get a wet towel every time I need to seal an envelope.
Also, I scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason. Because of your concern, I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.
I no longer drink Pepsi, or Dr Pepper, since the people who make these products are atheists who won't put "Under God" on their cans.
I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.
I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.
I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.
I no longer go to shopping malls because someone might drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.
I no longer receive packages from, nor send packages by UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.
I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.
I no longer eat KFC, because their "chickens" are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.
I no longer have any sneakers, but that will change once I receive my free replacement pair from Nike.
I no longer have to buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus, since I now have their recipe.
I no longer worry about my soul, because at last count I have 363,214 angels looking out for me.
I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends, stand on my head, and make a wish within five minutes.
I no longer have any savings, because I gave it to a sick girl who is about to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time).
I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special email program.
Have a Merry Christmas and lets be careful out there.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
The top 30 facts about how Chuck Norris can kick your arse. The beatings will continue until morale improves. (hat tip: Robbie)
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Never Going To Stop by Alter Bridge
On this day
I see clearly
Everything has come to life
In a place
In a broken dream
And we'll leave it all behind
On this day
Its so real to me
Everything has come to life
Another chance to chase a dream
Another chance to feel
Chance to feel alive
Dedicated to Angelia. Check out her very well written entry. Oh, and the picture is good too.
*cough cough* Hehehe...
*******************************************************
* Where are you
* And I'm so sorry
* I cannot sleep
* I cannot dream tonight
*******************************************************
Dont worry about life. You arent going to survive it anyway.
-- Anonymous saying
::: Tower View :::
Phone Etiquette
I guess when we are having a bad day, we pass it on to others via electronic means. As I was sitting in the office, the phone rings and the conversation goes on like this:
Me: Information Delivery Systems, this is Ken. How can I help you?
Caller: Umm... yeah, someone gave this number to call.
Me: Pardon?
Caller: Umm... someone named Ken Shima gave this number to call. Is this Ken?
Me: I'm sorry. May I ask who is calling?
Caller: Yeah, this is Diane. Is this Ken?
Me: May I ask what is about?
Caller: Is this Ken?
Me: May I ask what is about?
Caller: Well, this is Diane.
Me: And?
Caller: I was told to call this number.
Me: Ok...
Caller: Well, I'm Diane. Is this the right number?
Me: Yes it is. May I ask what this pertains to?
Caller: Ken had ordered this book and its on backorder.
Me: Ah ha! I got it! You're from the bookstore.
Caller: Oh.. yeah.. I'm from the bookstore. The warehouse called and said that your book is on backorder. It probably wont be in for at least three weeks.
I guess I could have abit kinder, but how hard would have it been to say "Hi, I'm from the bookstore and your book is on back order?" Instead, I had to go thru several minutes wondering if the IRS was coming after me.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Best Buy has a password in order to buy the Xbox 360. Frig that. I'll go to Circuit City who will be more than happy to take my money. (hat tip: Gizmodo)
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Sleeping Satellite by Tasmin Archer
I blame you for the moonlit sky
And the dream that died
With the eagles' flight
I blame you for the moonlit nights
When I wonder why
Are the seas still dry?
Dont blame this sleeping satellite
*******************************************************
* Where are you
* And I'm so sorry
* I cannot sleep
* I cannot dream tonight
*******************************************************
The big question to ask when it comes to relationships is do you want to be lonely or annoyed?
-- Richard Jeni
::: Tower View :::
One More For The Spotlight
I was going to add Chloe to the sidebar, but then she beat me to the punch and added me to her blog.
I like her personal style of writing and insight. She's not as wild as many of the others that I read; more down to Earth. And quite frankly, we all need that kind of person in our lives.
**********
A Robert Frost Moment
My mood of recent times dictated that I put this out there...
Fire And Ice by Robert Frost
Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those who favour fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Ionize your clothes clean. Which probably doesnt do a darn thing for the smell. Heh...
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Believe Me by Fort Minor
I used to have a little bit of a plan
Used to
Have a concept of where I stand
But that concept slipped right out of my hands
Now I don't really even know who I am
*******************************************************
* Where are you
* And I'm so sorry
* I cannot sleep
* I cannot dream tonight
*******************************************************
Give blood and get a hummer!
-- from a poster hanging at the gym
::: Tower View :::
Yet More Randomness
1. Finally! A title longer than two words.
2. Cache (In English, Hidden) looks like a damn good movie. What would you do when videos of you and your family suddenly began appearing at your doorstep? Check out the site here.
3. You tend to get worried when you are walking out of the men's room and your director is walking in. As you pass by, he mentions "Hey Ken! I heard about your comment at the meeting the other day..."
4. Weezer's frontman has been celibate for two years. Hell, a few folks I know can break that record. And it wasnt even their choice. *cough Doombringer cough*
5. Second Life is just as fun as The Sims2 and can be just as addicting.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Man runs marathons for a living. Damn, I have enough problems just trying to walk to the car.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Still by Alanis Morissette
I am the harm which you inflict.
I am your brilliance and frustration.
I am the nuclear bombs if they're to hit.
I am your immaturity and your indignance.
I am your misfits and your praised.
I am your doubt and your conviction.
I am your charity and your rape.
I am your grasping and expectation.
I see you averting your glances.
I see you cheering on the war.
I see you ignoring your children,
And I love you still.
From the Dogma soundtrack...
*******************************************************
* Where are you
* And I'm so sorry
* I cannot sleep
* I cannot dream tonight
*******************************************************
My dad once told me that if I didnt shape up, he would make me pick my switch. I told him that if he didnt shape up that I would make him pick his nursing home.
-- Tim Hester
::: Tower View :::
Brain Damage
Sleep is a luxury that I dont have lately. Its really self-induced, probably because I dont want to dream. I dont want to see the memories and visions that flash in my eyes. And as much as I try to block them out, they come back even more fierce than before.
Years of training to see with my mind's eye come back to haunt me. Now I cant turn it off.
So then this comes to mind:
How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!
The world forgetting, by the world forgot.
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!
Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd;
Its from the poem Eloisa to Abelard by Alexander Pope and the inspiration for the movie Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind (ironically enough).
What if we could erase those memories that hurt us the most? Would we do it? Should we do it? Would we lose those things that define who we are?
...And would it be worth it?
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Here is Jenna's poem about needing help. This is such a good one that I had to mark it.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Playground by The Outfield
I'm alone and
I'm lost in this playground
The lights are down on me
All alone and
Afraid in this playground
The city never sleeps
If you listen you won't understand
So confused I don't know where I am
*******************************************************
* Where are you
* And I'm so sorry
* I cannot sleep
* I cannot dream tonight
*******************************************************
I drink to stay warm and to kill few selected memories
-- Conor Oberst
::: Tower View :::
Installed Memory
I had seen this on Chloe's and The Mrs' blogs. Seems like an interesting concept.
If you read this, if your eyes are passing over this right now, (even if we don't speak often) please post a comment with a COMPLETELY MADE UP AND FICTIONAL memory of you and me. It can be anything you want - good or bad - BUT IT HAS TO BE FAKE.When you're finished, post this little paragraph on your blog and be surprised (or mortified) about what people DON'T ACTUALLY remember about you!
So I figured, what the hell...
There was that time when we were having dinner at the Cheesecake Factory. You were ticked because the waiter, who made it apparent that he was gay, kept flirting with me. You werent sure if you were mad because you as a female should feel insulted or if it was another wait staff member hitting on me. You tolerated the waitresses, but now a waiter?
Good thing I dont have comments here. This should break the chain.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Merry Christmas from Chewbacca. Somehow this is wrong. I dont know how, but it is. (blame: Anna)
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Only A Memory by The Smithereens
Why should it matter if I cry
I sit around and wonder why
Now I feel much too weak to live
And I've got nothing left to give
Now it's only a memory
*******************************************************
* What do you do
* When somebody lets you down
* And you want to say something
* But you can’t cause they're not around
*******************************************************
Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.
-- Norman Cousins
::: Tower View :::
Brash Statements
I've been a little testy lately to say the least. Everyone at the office has noticed, but have been kind enough not to press the issue or have given me some space, especially when many of my conversations have been like these:
Mike: I think we have to get that documentation in by today.
Me: F*ck it. It'll get there when it gets there.
Patty: The Coffee Club needs decaf.
Me: That isnt all you f*ckers need.
Aimee: We can work on this tomorrow. You are going to be here, right?
Me: I dont know. You f*ckers are getting on my nerves.
Deedra: What about you Ken? What personal goals do you have for next year?
Me: I really need to spend some time out on the range.
Deedra: Oh? The golf range?
Me: Oh no. The firing range. I've got several pieces that really need to be used. And very soon.
I probably shouldnt have made that last comment in front of the Human Resources representative. Or even my manager as a matter of fact.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Lance going to Italian court for defamation. "Wah! I couldnt beat him in the Tour De France. Then he chased me down and called me mean names. Sue him! Wah!"
**********
Your latest movie critics: Statler & Waldorf from The Muppet Show. And these guys should know. They've been in the business since the dinosaur age. (hat tip: Puppetvision)
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Krwlng by Linkin Park
This lack of self-control
I fear is never ending
Controlling
I cant seem
To find myself again
My walls are closing in
Without a sense
Of confidence
I’m convinced
Ihat there is just too much pressure to take
I’ve felt this way before
So insecure
*******************************************************
* What do you do
* When somebody lets you down
* And you want to say something
* But you can’t cause they're not around
*******************************************************
Patty: There are so many inappropriate toys for our boys nowadays.
Robbie: You want inappropriate toys? How about getting them the Brokeback Mountain action figures with kung fu grip?
-- from a conversation at work
::: Tower View :::
Welcome To South Park
I forget which blog directed me to the South Park Character Generator so my apologies to whomever it was.
My picture seems quite appropriate nowadays.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
In 2009, everything is a lie. 2009 Lost Memories is great action sci-fi film from Korea. Hollywood will steal this one too eventually.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Late Goodbye by Poets Of The Fall
In our headlights
Staring
Bleak
Beer cans
Deer's eyes
On the asphalt
Underneath
Our crushed plans
And my lies
Lonely street signs
Powerlines
They keep on flashing
Flashing by
Fury has added this to his blog. Too cool...
*******************************************************
* What do you do
* When somebody lets you down
* And you want to say something
* But you can’t cause they're not around
*******************************************************
Little things used to mean so much to Shelly. I used to think they were kind of trivial. Believe me, nothing is trivial.
-- Eric Draven from The Crow
::: Tower View :::
Its The Little Things
Ever notice that its the littlest things that flash before your eyes? They tend to bring out the wierdest reactions in us.
When I am in the grocery store and happen to see an emory board, a soft memory appears before me; reminding me of a better time. Something I had wanted.. no, needed to see... for a very long time. Nowadays, something so small causes a large amount of pain.
Standing in the book store, I come across the James Patterson section. At first there is a hint of a smile on my face, which is suddenly changed to a large amount of anger and the need to kick the entire section down.
Somehow, its these little things that require me to get the hell out of there.
**********
From The Major Case Squad
Detective Bobby Goren was kind enough to grant permission for me to add him to the list. He posts entries in between cases, but nothing based on his workload. Damn it!
I'll have to see if I can talk him into at least reading Nicole Wallace's case file... heh...
So give Goren a peek, even if you arent a Law and Order fan...
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Italian government hits up Pron industry for extra funds. Pu**y, pu**y, pu**y! Here at the Titty Twister we're slashing pu**y in half! If we dont have it, you dont want it!
**********
The Grand Tours dont want to be part of the Grand Tour. Whew! To non-cycling fans, this is the same as the Colts, Steelers, Bucs, Seahawks, Rams, and Patriots all say they dont want to play in NFL.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Boiler by Limp Bizkit
I used to be alive
I'm so pathetic
But now I get it
What's done is done
I know you just leave it alone
And don't regret it
But sometimes some things
Turn into dumb things
And that's when you put your foot down.
*******************************************************
* What do you do
* When somebody lets you down
* And you want to say something
* But you can’t cause they're not around
*******************************************************
You used to be fun. You used to be warped and twisted and hilarious... and I mean that in the best way - I mean it as a compliment!
-- Lloyd Dobler from Say Anything
::: Tower View :::
I Am Lloyd Dobler
I always liked that movie. It always seemed appropriate, especially for me. Somehow, someway, the movie finds its way back to me during especially trying times in my life.
If you havent seen it, go rent, borrow, or buy it. Definately one of the few romantic comedies that I didnt mind to watch.
**********
One For the Angels
I added Angelia's blog to the list. She's definately a good read and damn good digital artist.
I got the idea of adding the music to the blog from her.
Check her out.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Dykes On Bikes is now a trademark. I guess that is better than "Muffs On Wheels."
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Fine Again by Seether
And I am aware now
Of how everything’s gonna be fine
One day
Too late
I’m in hell
I am prepared now
Seems everyone’s going to be fine
One day
Too late
Just as well...
***************************************
* Days go by
* And still I think of you
* Days when I couldnt live
* My life without you
***************************************
One should die proudly when it is no longer possible to live proudly
-- Nietzsche
::: Tower View :::
A Date Which Will Live In Infamy
Never forget...
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
82 year old woman fights the Law. And the Law won...
**********
::: Background Noise :::
The Hard Way by Fort Minor
Can somebody please just explain to me
What happened to the way
That we always said we would be
Right now I dont know why I push through the pain
That I got through
And I’m losing hope
Give me one reason not to...
***************************************
* Days go by
* And still I think of you
* Days when I couldnt live
* My life without you
***************************************
Gi: I know! I'll get a meatball sub and have them take off the meatballs.
Me: Good Lord, woman. You're killing me.
Robbie: Yeah, Gi. Just get a regular meatball sub, then you can lick the sauce from the balls.
-- conversation from lunch
::: Tower View :::
I'm being too lazy to do any real posting. Too much going on to discuss now so this seemed appropriate...
Eat Me
You Are Chinese Food |
 Exotic yet ordinary. People think they've had enough of you, but they're back for more in an hour. |
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
No Christmas for you, jackass. Tis the season to shut the f**k up. (hat tip: Fury)
**********
Work bores Japan's youth. How ironic. It bores America's youth too.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
WthYou by Linkin Park
It’s true
The way I feel
Was promised by your face
The sound of your voice
Painted on my memories
Even if you’re not with me
***************************************
* Days go by
* And still I think of you
* Days when I couldnt live
* My life without you
***************************************
Nice palm. I read a great deal of pleasure in your future.
-- from a Taco Bell sauce packet
::: Tower View :::
I Got Six Little Friends
...And they can all run faster than you...
Ok, hard drinkers. Lets drink hard.
Which B-Movie Badass Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
hat tip: Julie
**********
I Got Your Quiz Right Here
Appropriated from Angelia.
A- Age of my first kiss: 12
B- Band I am listening to right now: Mercy Drive
C- Crush: Yes, I'm feeling crushed. Why?
D- Dad's name: Dad
E- Easiest person to talk to: Definately not me!
F- Favorite ice cream: Cookies and Cream
G- Gummy bears or gummy worms: Gummy Bears
H- Hometown: [CLASSIFIED]
I- Instruments: Piano, drums
J- Junior high: The 8th grade was the best four years of my life
K- Kids: The one currently at the keyboard
L- Longest car ride ever: The ride home after being suspended for fighting at school
M- Mom's name: Mom
N- Nickname: Kenny, Bastard... Depends on who you ask.
O- One wish: Hmmm... I think I I'll keep this one
P- Phobias: Dying alone
Q- Quote: I didnt say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame you.
R- Reason to smile : Surviving the day
S- Song I last sang: In The End by Linkin Park (and I wouldnt call it singing)
T- Time I woke up today: I never got to sleep
U- Unknown fact about me: If I told, then it wouldnt be unknown, would it?
V- Vegetable(s): Green beans, corn
W- Worst habit: Obnoxious bossy behaviour
X- X-Rays I've had: 6?
Y- Years since I've been to church: Last Christmas
Z- Zodiac sign: Sagitarius
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Everyone is having more sex than me. And the video only proves it. Heh.
**********
Man pleads guilty to having sex with horse. This falls under the "What The Fu*k Where You Thinking?!" category.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Living In A Dream by Psuedo Echo
Fear lies over me
I feel it all around
Something is looking at me
And I think its got a crown
Its not a king or a Queen
But something in-between
Now I'm only hoping
I'm living in a dream
Its strange how things seem
When you are living in a dream
***************************************
* Days go by
* And still I think of you
* Days when I couldnt live
* My life without you
***************************************
I used to have sex with a guy in a wheelchair. Our favorite position was sixty-nine. He called me "Meals on Wheels."
-- Lisa Lampanelli
::: Tower View :::
Yet More Random Silliness
1) Its World Toilet Week and apparently there is alot of sh*t going on. (hat tip: Anna)
2) Speaking of which, Anna, why exactly are you in Canada? The Grey cup was this weekend so you can come back now. Heh.
3) On the subject of toilets, I made the mistake of catching a certain part of the movie Jackass on Comedy Central. It was the scene where the guy goes to the hardware store and uses the demo toilet. Toilet paper and all. The entire time I was thinking "What the f**k am I doing watching this?!" The sad part was I actually sat thru the whole scene.
4) March Of The Pengins comes out tomorrow. I'll have to think about this one.
5) The PostSecret book is also out tomorrow. As a fan of the site, I will definately be getting this. Matter of fact, I need to add it to the links.
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Ric Flair takes out a driver. Showing once again, he is the dirtiest player in the game. Heh.
**********
The 24 Sex Tips From Women for Christmas. Great. Another present I have no use for.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Desperate People by Living Colour
Feel the earth revolving
See the sun dissolving
And the night coming after you
You have no direction
And you have no protection
What are you going to do when
Your trip turns blue?
***************************************
* Days go by
* And still I think of you
* Days when I couldnt live
* My life without you
***************************************
Dee: Joanie, are you all right?
Me: She's just gagging. She wasnt sure if she wanted to spit or swallow.
-- from a conversation at work
::: Tower View :::
Where Is the Emma Watson Age-Of-Consent Counter?
I have to admit Harry Potter And The Goblet of Fire was pretty good. I thought the ending was abit weak, but since I havent read any of the books, I have no idea if its close.
The best part was there really wasnt as much of a flood on the pre-movie hype. Normally for the really crappy movies, they are being advertised by Burger King, McDonalds, etc, weeks before the movie even comes out.
The best thing I saw was the Sports Illustrated article on the World Cup of Quidditch. (Hat Tip: Muggle Net).
So if you got time, catch this flick. Just make sure you leave the kiddies at home...
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
Reasons not to buy an Xbox360. Damn, J is going to be ticked.
**********
Crying woman saved from cremation. Pay your hospital bills or get fried.
**********
Student accused of urinating in ice machine. No wonder the soda tasted like there was a little wang in it.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Burning Inside My Light by Mercy Drive
Hey!
Nothing you can say
Nothing is going to change what you've done to me
Now its time to shine
I'm going to take what's mine
While you're going to burn inside my light
This is better known Randy Orton's theme.
***************************************
* Days go by
* And still I think of you
* Days when I couldnt live
* My life without you
***************************************
Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, eating her curds and whey. Along came a spider, he sat down beside her and said "Hey, what's in the bowl, bitch?!"
-- Andrew Dice Clay
::: Tower View :::
Its Going To Be One Of Those Days
You know what is really annoying?
Say you are sitting in a meeting with senior management of the company, including a couple of vice presidents. They are looking at your group for the work you've done for the past couple of months.
Then ten minutes into the meeting you have to get up and run the bathroom because something didnt feel right.
So there you are in the restroom, realizing you have just embarrassed yourself by having your water breaking two weeks early, and you are going into labor.
Now you have to go back to the meeting, get your purse, and quietly apologize for leaving so early because your first born has decided that the meeting was so boring that even he had to get the hell out of there. Then you have to call your husband, call the hospital, drive your tail over there, all while the 7lb 4oz boy is attempting to escape his cell.
So begins the story of Riley, son of my coworker, Steffie.
Congrats to you kids! Now you really have a story to tell, hm?
**********
::: Out In The Yard :::
The City Of Villains has invaded. Gah, and I havent even maxed my characters on City of Heroes yet.
**********
Parents blame newsgroup for assistanting daughter's suicide. Pointing the finger is always easier than looking in the mirror.
**********
Roberto Heras is suspended for positive EPO test. The Spainairds must be taking drug testing hints from the French. In the past 3 years, the Tour of Spain has 'suddenly' found EPO in their race contenders or winners, all of whom have been clean in all prior races throughout their entire careers.
**********
::: Background Noise :::
Wake Me Up When September Ends by Green Day
Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
Wake me up when September ends
Like my fathers come to pass
Twenty years has gone so fast
Wake me up when September ends
***************************************
* Days go by
* And still I think of you
* Days when I couldnt live
* My life without you
***************************************
The Steward
